The Poetic Side of the BCS

The Muse hit me last night–hard.  She kept pestering me until I took advantage of the fact that my mentor teacher (who is also in charge of the Christmas program) was leading the class in rehearsal, so I grabbed a thesaurus to aid in finding synonyms that could rhyme easily, and scribbled down this tribute to NCAA football since 1998.

Ode to an Anachronism

Oh, what a tangled web we weave,
When first we practice to conceive
A way to determine a champion national
Totally devoid of analysis rational.

Lose early in season, a team’ll survive.
Lose even mid-season, they may still thrive,
But wait ’til the end-season riv’lry to lose,
By January 2nd, they’re yesterday’s news.

And God forbid there should ever be
Two teams in a conference winning each vict’ry
And meeting each other in a conference final
So that the loser drops below other teams idle.

But the most egregious aberration by far,
Is to have three teams at end of season reg’lar
Vying for the lone conference division spot
Leaving two teams surpassed by those who do not.

Tell me, what is the legitimacy here
To perpetuate this unfairness year after year
With teams of near-perfection penalized
For belonging to a conference championship-sized?

Or, even worse, using this B–no “C”–S,
To decide who in the conference is best,
And relying heavily on opinions hollow
Of coaches with no time for such things to follow.

Since teams in divisions once called “II” and “III”
Can work out a playoff so effortlessly,
And Division I basketball teams sixty-four
Can also succeed–can’t we have just one more?

Alas!  We’ll ne’er see an FBS playoff hence,
For the idea, unfortunately, just makes too much sense!

Still, the title may have done a disservice–an anachronism is something whose time has passed.   What is the name for something whose time never was???


3 Responses to “The Poetic Side of the BCS”

  1. 1 Jennifer December 8, 2008 at 10:38 pm

    Wonderful Ginny! My last rewrite was about boobs. I posted it on a gun forum. I will have to share it on the ol’ blog as well.

  2. 2 Instinct December 9, 2008 at 2:46 pm

    boobs and sports… they go together like chocolate and peanut butter

  3. 3 The Zoo December 26, 2008 at 5:57 pm

    We hope yur Christmas wuz bery Merry.

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