Barbeque Artist

Someone on my favorite chat room posted this YouTube video tonight:

I just had to give the following reply:


What I can tell you about the artist after one viewing (and my extensive knowledge of barbeque).

HE IS NOT FROM NORTH CAROLINA: There is no coleslaw on top of the barbeque sauce.

HE IS NOT FROM VIRGINIA: Notice he is using his hands? How provincial!

HE IS NOT FROM SOUTH CAROLINA OR GEORGIA: He is using tomato-based sauce, which is anathema, blasphemy, and heresy in those two states, as well as N. Carolina. Barbeque sauce is vinegar-based, period; although in pockets of the Carolinas, mustard-based sauce has popped up from time to time. Anyone in those states who acknowledges tomato-based sauce is a damned carpetbagger. (Said the Georgian whose grandmother’s bridge partner was Victor Jory!)

HE IS TEXAS-INFLUENCED, BUT IS NOT A TEXAN: Yes, Texans believe that the only way to season barbeque is by rubbing (which the artist clearly did), but the only permissible seasonings are dry-rubs and wood smoke. Using sauce at any time pegs you as a (non-Texan) furriner (if’n you cook with it) or as insulting your host’s cooking (if’n you put it on while you’re eatin’ it).

HE IS NOT A YANKEE OR A CALIFORNIAN: What did he make a painting of? A buck! ‘Nuff said.


THIS DUDE IS EITHER FROM TENNESSEE OR KENTUCKY!!! Okay, maybe Arkansas, but I doubt it.


5 Responses to “Barbeque Artist”

  1. 1 Instinct March 3, 2008 at 1:59 pm

    Could be from Ohio too. Deer art, BBQ sauce, eating with the hands…. I have inlaws like that 😀

  2. 2 Instinct March 3, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    Testing, does thing thing work now??

  3. 3 gatakitty March 3, 2008 at 10:42 pm

    Thing thing works just fine now. Thanks thanks!

    Besides, O Benevolent and Protective Wingleader, isn’t Ohio just Kentucky North? :mrgreen:

    *ducks and runs for cover*

  4. 4 Instinct March 4, 2008 at 1:02 am

    No, Ohio is West Virginia North. Kentucky is the trailer trash cousin of Ohio and West Virginia but thinks that it’s better than both of them.

    Seriously, went there once and as soon as they saw the Ohio plates the attitudes came out all over the place

  5. 5 gatakitty March 4, 2008 at 8:13 am

    OK, I’ll take your word for it. 😀

    I’ve only had one experience in Kentucky as well–spent a night in Paducah about 25 years ago. I should stop glowing at night in another 15 years when the half-life expires. :mrgreen:

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